Paper and Ink: Femme Aimee (13)

Paper and Ink: Femme Aimee (13)

By Emmeline Bisiikwa, Uganda:

For some stupid reason people never appreciate what they have till it's gone. Sort of like the lyrics to Let her go. You only know you love her when you let her go… This would explain the ex-syndrome of chasing after what they lost like their life depends on it. People have always wanted to better themselves and will do anything to get that elusive sense of contentment that comes from getting what you want. The problem is many don't know exactly what they want.

For the days leading up to Valentine's Day, many people get unexpected and expected calls from the exes. I don't understand why they believe if they make some grand gesture it will fix all the ways they hurt you but I guess logic isn't part of what guides those actions.

Imagine my surprise when a certain ex called me up and asked me to be his valentine. I was a bit shocked considering that for all the years we had been together there was no such thing as romance or surprises or dates. Valentine's and anniversaries were just another day and to tell you the truth it sucked. I hated being with someone who couldn't bother to do the things I needed to make me feel special.

So come many months after the break up why on earth would I go back to someone just because he flew me out somewhere special for a weekend? The choice of surprise was a bone of contention in itself; did he expect to get into my pants? So was this a scheme to sleep with me for old times' sake or was it an honest to goodness apology?

Are people even capable of changing? If I was with him for all that time and he couldn't be bothered to make minimum effort how is it any different now? Why would he suddenly change yet he wouldn't change for you? I guess that is something I will never know. I decided I wasn't going back down that road ever again.

You had me once, you screwed up so bad that I walked away. Now you have to live with that. No amount of maybes or what ifs can change the past. As for do-overs, well let's just say I don't believe in those. I wasn't important once enough for you to change. What is so different now? Besides, you just might need to keep playing the ex-syndrome card till it works for you, on someone else.

Founder and Editor in Chief of the Readers Cafe Africa

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