Paper and Ink, Series

Paper and Ink: Femme Aimee 3

By Emmeline Bisiikwa, Uganda:

We just had our first pregnancy scare. You know you're screwed when it's supposed to be that time of the month but your period is playing hard to get. It's a cliché thing 'cause everyone knows when you have unprotected sex you get pregnant but when you're pregnant it's always, How did that happen?

I was beginning to see why mother had told me to stay away from boys. I was nowhere near ready for a child and my dear boyfriend was a child. He certainly couldn't raise a kid. I thought about all the conversations we hadn't had. Like if he wanted children, how many he wanted, and what we would call them.

He gave me that look – the one that says – “what the heck” each time I tried to raise the subject and I dutifully backed down. I wasn't ready to alienate him. But backing down had got me into a corner and there was no way I could get myself out of this. I knew we had a fight coming up; one he wouldn't take the fall for.

I went shopping. I needed therapy. Unfortunately the pretty dresses lost their hold on me when I thought of myself with a bulging stomach in those snug dresses. I tried looking at rings and they haunted me. Would he ever propose? Did he even want to? Or was he just stringing me along?

I curled up into a ball in my bed and watched Devious Maids as I ate the flavor out of a big bowl of ice cream. I needed a treat. I deserved one. This scare was rocking more than just my life.

I sent him a message. What would you do if I was pregnant?

Bury you.

Ouch. I just missed my period.

The heck? How?

I don't know. You tell me!!

He drove right over and budged in.  His presence assaulted my senses and nerves. What was he going to do? What if he wanted nothing to do with me? Well, the hospital sorted that out; apparently it was just a delay.

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