Myself, meet Stranger

By Inet Morudu, South Africa:

I have watched myself evolve for the filthiest worst.

From human, down back to ape.

I am Sticky from sexual immorality,

heart hairy from emotional neglect.

I am sweaty from exerting man power

into a forced relation that shows no sign of surviving

 without the sacrifice of my moral conscience.

I can barely recognize the thoughts that swirl,

suck and slurp me into self pity.

I don't know this heart that beats in this fragile body.

Whose is it?

It's so hard and rigid against the push of a loving current.

It's too late to revive it from the stab of being second best, an option, a gap filler.

Where is the receptive heart?

I have become a stranger to myself.

From the inside out. It's all new.

It's cold. It's clingy. It's empty.

It's lonely. It's ugly. It's needy.

 It's desperate. It's not I. It's a stranger.

Myself, you have been replaced, meet Stranger.