Paper and Ink, Series

Paper and Ink: Misunderstood and Tired

By Emmeline Bisiikwa, Uganda:

There are certain times when at the end of the day you are so exhausted you simply collapse onto your bed and doze off, too weary to even stretch a muscle. At this point you give up the pleasures of television because you find the noise too intrusive. You opt not to turn on your internet because you are simply too overwhelmed: you can't think for one more second.

And then the complaints begin. You don't call or text anymore, you don't have time for us, you forgot all about us. How do you begin to explain that sometimes you just don't have the strength to sustain a conversation? Doesn't it happen to everyone? Doesn't one feel the need for solace and blissful silence after a long day?

It's not easy for your good friends to understand that you don't want to talk to them. Most friendships are nurtured based on shared experiences and conversations. They are supposed to be the person you turn to when you are stressed and overwhelmed so pushing them away doesn't make any sense. Explaining that you don't want to talk is even harder. Why wouldn't you want to talk to your best friend? Have they offended you in some way?

You may have to pick between your need for personal space and your friends. At the end of the day, no one wants to feel unwanted or taken for granted. To decide to enjoy your peace and quiet could rock your friendship so hard; you would remain shaken at how quickly that fight started. It's much easier to find a balance between the two, like maybe talking about topics that won't get you agitated.

For my part I would prefer to enjoy my solitude. Sometimes you need to treat yourself to a break from the messages and replies and worries that come from friends. It's much easier to be misunderstood when tired.

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