Taxi Tales: Men Who Dress Like Women
By David Tumusiime, Uganda:
It was like everybody was waiting for him to step off and begin gumming about him. He was that extraordinary. Except it was not like a VIP had left us. But a knockoff. At least that's what the woman who had been seated next to him seemed to think.
Not mincing her words, as we watched him bob away after he had paid his fare, she wondered, “That guy walks like a joke. Who does he think he is? Bobi Wine? What kind of man thinks we want to see his cheeks?”
A dark suited man chortled, “It's the fashion these days. Men dress like women and women dress like men. Even the thinking has changed”.
But the woman would not let up, “I understand the whole Chief Justice of Kenya wears earrings. No wonder that country is confused. I can't stand a man who wears earrings. But this one has not stopped at earrings. Did you see all the tattoos he has? Is he a cow that he is afraid he is going to be rustled?”
Her snarky companion egged her on, “But you were enjoying your conversation with him. The whole way from the park when he rammed himself against you, as the conductor asked him to extend so he could find a place to squeeze himself in”.
The woman shivered like it was a memory she never wanted to re-live. Shake this off once and for good. She scoffed, “You can't imagine he was giving me these long stories that he wants me to be in his music video. That I'm a natural for a character in his song about marriage and in-laws. Didn't say which character he wants me for. He was begging me to give him my contacts so he calls me”.
The conductor chips in, “Why don't you do it? You could become famous.” The woman was more than annoyed, “I don't need the kind of fame he's offering. He actually believes a song produced in a bungalow studio in Makindye can change the world. What kind of madness is that? I don't need those kinds of marijuana dreams in my life. Nothing in Uganda can change.”
The man joined her in her scorn, “As if Uganda can be changed by youth who don't know the use of a belt!”