By Kizzy Katawonga:
Who runs the world? Girls.
That's what Beyonce wants us to believe with her hit song. So does Alicia Keys who sings Superwoman. I hear a lot of these songs lately. Call them women's empowerment anthems. There is a tsunami of women's lib and empowerment that is sweeping modern society like never before. It's great to see women finally being recognized, appreciated and celebrated for their uniqueness and contributions to this world.
However, there is a down side to this new wave; men and manliness are being swept away. I see more than ever, men being despised, disrespected, pushed aside, valued less, vilified and loathed.
In the last couple of millennia, men have been top dogs while women have been merely considered property or at best, ABM's – automated baby machines. I laughed when I saw a scene from a Disney classic Beauty & The Beast, where Gaston the antagonist tells our damsel Belle, that women shouldn't read because they'll start thinking and that could become troublesome.
Seriously?! Was it because men at the time knew education of women would expose their domination as a falsehood? I don't know, but as funny as it was to hear such a ridiculous statement, many men in the past and even now still believe that. That's why girls were never sent to school. It was a rather obtuse way of keeping women in check.
However, as we entered a more enlightened age in the last few decades, women have finally broken free of so many of those ignorant ways. Women are now educated, highly successful career-driven individuals contributing so much to modern society. We even have affirmative action and various gender based incentives to help women succeed faster and further than ever before. Thank God we now value women as they deserve; well much more than before any ways.
Women have more say, exposure and opportunities than any other time in history. So then, what's the problem?
The problem is an ever increasing sense of reprisal against men and manliness. After years of being undermined, there is a generational anger possessed by a majority of women who feel it's time men paid for all the suffering of mistreated women going back millennia. An undertone of loathing and vengeance permeates the attitudes of a lot of women today. Too many generations of abused mothers passing on their pain and frustrations on to their daughters has left very little room for men to be considered anything more than dogs who want to hump anything in a skirt (and now even anything not in a skirt).
It doesn't help that these feelings have been re-affirmed by the selfish actions of millions of men still trying to dominate. A lot of women are justified in their feelings. Too many actually! So many mothers forced to raise children alone because they were abandoned by the fathers has led many a modern woman to believe they can actually do it all and only need men as sperm donors.
Several single mothers today work and provide, protect and teach their children; apparently very successfully. Why bother with a man? Many men too, are beginning to believe that women are actually superior creatures and won't even try any more to be responsible men in the home.
There's a rising trend of young successful career driven women who simply want to find a suitable sperm donor so they can have and raise a child on their own. They have money, time and historical proof on their side to show us, that indeed men aren't necessary. They are more of an inconvenience to be avoided if possible. Interestingly, I've observed that one of the overriding allures of Lesbianism stems from women believing that women make better lovers and companions than men. Hmmm…
So what about manliness then? Well, that's a bad word these days. Like Pedophile. Chivalry is dead or atleast on life support. Women don't seem to need men to open the doors for them or go out and toil for her all day to provide for them. On the contrary, women need men to stop being men.We are told to share our feelings, getting in touch with our feminine side, be vulnerable. Oprah had men crying and sharing their feelings and being vulnerable in front of total strangers on global television.
But it's still not enough that we aren't needed as fathers and providers. We're being asked to soften our looks, do our nails, wear makeup, texturize our hair, use moisturizer and go to the spa for mud baths. We wear earrings and shave our chest hair. All hail the metrosexual man—more like the girly man.
Rex Harrison in the classic movie, My fair Lady ranted “Why can't women be more like men?” Well he would truly kick himself now that the question has been so reversed!
Traditionally, men are supposed to be the strong ones, protecting their women and children from the elements. Men are supposed to go out and sweat to provide a life for their family, to lead with boldness and courage, turning chaos into order. Men are the vanguards of morality, education and progress; But not so much anymore.
So I ask; where does that leave men and manliness? What are we supposed to do? Who are we supposed to be? If all the traditional manly roles of provider, protector, head of the home can easily be handled by the modern woman, what then? If we aren't needed to be fathers who care, nurture and teach their children, what then? If we aren't the head of the home, looked to for guidance, strength and direction, what then? If we can't do manly things because they aren't needed, then what?
If girls run the world, what happens to the men?
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